THE YOUNG ONES : Episode Guide

First Season

"Fascist oiks at the Town Hall want to demolish the house. Why bother, with Vyv around to do the business for them ?"

The Town Hall announces plans to knock their house down. This was the pilot episode, and it shows. All the essential elements that made The Young Ones what it is is there in one form or another, but some elements of the characters are expanded upon here and others contracted. Mike is more of a self-styled ladykiller, Neil keeps trying to commit suicide, Rick's poetry and love of Cliff Richard is more fanatical, and Vyvyan makes his entrance through a wall.

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"As Rick, Vyv, Neil, and Mike move into their new house, the talking statue at the front door begins an odyssey of zaniness that is to culminate in a worker's revolution and a fully-fledged benefit concert in the front room."

Moving into an new house, Vyvyan finds oil in the basement. This was made six months after DEMOLITION, yet transmitted the week after it. Infamous moments from this one include Buddy Holly singing about insects, the two hard-working executives taking a holiday in front of a 20-watt bulb, Neil having six pairs of arms

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"Is life really that boring for the four students ? A terrorist siege in their own house; a visitation from Hell; a fairy tale world that flourishes while they are asleep. And yet they are so B-O-R-E-D that Neil is driven to dig himself in a grave and Vyv chops his finger off."

It's an average boring normal day in Studentville - or is it? This features a walk down Abbey Road (in London) to the Kebab and Calculator (in Bristol), the three bears, a red dwarf from Hell called Ftooomch, Vyvyan's mother, and Madness singing House Of Fun. Anyone who was in Studentville will know days like this :)

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"A potentially explosive situation erupts when a bomb falls on the house .... But worse ! The TV licence man calls."

The lads find an atomic bomb and try to auction it to the highest seller. This involves Neil painting himself white to deflect a nuclear blast, the Dicky and Dino show, and Dexys' Midnight Runners singing Jackie Wilson Said in the toilet. Footage of a plane dropping the bomb precedes the credits. Notice that when the gang switches on the TV to find out what's going on, the picture of the test card is actually stuck onto the TV, and the camera swings around to hide this fact after the TV has outlived its' usefulness...

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"It's party-time ! Where else could you mingle with the four horsemen of the Apocalypse, a giant sandwich and a singing tomato? Pretty amazing stuff eh ? Just ignore Neil's boring hippy friend chilling-out in the fridge ... "

The household organises a party. This one features Jennifer Saunders with toy mice in her handbag, Neil on the moon, Rick's sociology professor Jim Morrison, Cinderella and Santa Claus. The band tonight are RIP, RIG AND PANIC, which I think features a young Neneh Cherry. If you've ever held a party as a stoodent, you may well sympathise with this one...

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"While London floods, Rick tries to elevate proceedings with a game of hide-and-seek. Meanwhile his sociology file is set on fire by Vyv, Mike's room is occupied by a pride of lions, and landlord Alexei Sayle turns into an axe-wielding homicidal maniac."

It starts with the guys being bored, and Neil repeatedly bashing himself in the face with a frying pan. The guys also try to eat Neil when he returns from the supermarket empty-handed. Vyv hides in the wardrobe and ends up in Narnia. No band.

Second Season

"Who produced the world's stickiest bogey and the world's stupidest bottom-burp ? Who's smashing the oiks on University Challenge and who's swotting away for teacher like a total spasmo?"

The lads compete on a game show against some upper-class students, while The Elephant Man attempts to convince Tony Robinson that he is an elephant.

Probably the most famous episode, this is especially appreciated after exams! This features Motorhead performing Ace Of Spades, and lots of British stars, including someone who will later fall to pieces in front of 500,000,000 viewers across the world...

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"Hey man ! It's really wierd ! Strange things keep happening. Like plates are disappearing and the tables keep, well, shrinking. Looks like there's a poltergoost in the house...."

Our heroes find themselves running out of money, Vyvyan announces his pregnancy and Neil becomes a police officer. The song is Subterranean Homesick Blues performed by (amongst others) Jools Holland, Glen Tilbrook, and Stewart Copeland (of The Police).

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"Ashes to ashes, funk to funky, Vyv is now a video head and Neil's wearing a dress because some really selfish negative vibe merchant boarded up his bedroom. Only pop music can save them now."

The video revolution catches with the gang as they decide to rent some nasty videos with plenty of sex and violence. Of course, a vampire (naturally from South Africa) tends to ruin things. The band playing in the living room are The Damned with Video Nasty. This episode has a different beginning sequence, presenting the episode as if it were a horror film.

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"Vyv's being violently and copiously sick because Rick's like scored with a chick and the whole house has like gone through some kind of time warp."

Can it be true ?!! Rick found a girlfriend ?!!! This episode also starts with different credits, a Dallas parody featuring a secretary typing with her nipples... The band are Amazulu, with So Much Love.

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"There's bogeys on the blankets and snot on the sheets when Neil and the others come down with the worst colds in the history of civilisation !"

Neil has a cold, and even Vyvyan's cure of drilling a nail in his head doesn't quite work, which is a pity since it sparks off a street riot. They're also taken hostage by Brian Damage, an escaped murderer. But their troubles are forgotten as the real horror happens - Neil's parents come to tea!! Also features a good parody of The Good Life (aka Good Neighbors in the U.S.), Madness singing Our House and the return of Vyvyan's mother.

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"Hey, everybody ! School's out ! Hurray ! Hurray ! Except, like there's nothing to do, man, apart from getting on a big red bus and having a really explosive trip. It should be pretty good fun, actually."

In the final episode, the summer holidays beckon. Rick's parents die, and they are all thrown out of the house with no money. Will Rick be forced to sell his body ? What will our intrepid heroes do next ? The music is brought to you by John Otway, singing Body Talk.


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